Teaching Students with Intellectual Disabilities to become Appropriately Independent
There is one fundamental truth that every college student comes to face when they are on their own for the first time: at one time or another, you will have to do your laundry. For some of us, this is a daunting task of rules and procedures. Will my Kate Spade satin crepe top survive the heat and endless tumble of the dryer? Do I spend that precious $1.50 for another load of whites or combine it with my load of colors? Let’s be honest, do I really need fabric softener? Through the trials and mistakes of mixing colors with whites, stretching sweaters out and shrinking down designer jeans, we all have that first rush of opening the dryer door and seeing our clothes come out warm and clean. In that moment, we have just gained a small victory in our lives, and have become one step closer to discovering our own independence. As we dump the clean clothes unceremoniously into a drawer and force it shut, we think to ourselves, maybe, just maybe, we can make it on our own.
The idea of being independent is planted in all of us at a young age. As children, we can’t wait to be self-sufficient. We long to live on our own without rules, curfews, and vegetables for dinner. When I was younger, I couldn’t wait to get my drivers license. That was the ultimate level of self-reliance. If I had my license, then I could transport myself anywhere. If I had the ability to drive, I wouldn’t have to rely on my parents, I would be free. I remember telling my father in the car on the way home from church one sunny, Sunday morning, “You know, I’ve been watching you drive for 12 years now. I think I’ve got it figured out. Why don’t you let me take a shot at it?” My father wisely chuckled and firmly shot that request down. What I didn’t understand then was that independence does not mean freedom. In fact, what my father understood, and why he did not let me slide into the driver’s seat and test my knowledge of the road, was that when you gain independence, you gain responsibility.
Appropriate Independence is defined as, “supported self-sufficiency that is aligned with the strengths of each individual and guided by Christian values.” In short, never do for the individual what they can learn to do for themselves.[1]
We are all created uniquely and we all have different strengths and abilities. The journey towards Appropriate Independence is the same for everyone but the outcome is vastly different. Appropriate Independence is striving to reach our greatest potential. At Shepherds College, we help students discover their own path towards Appropriate Independence with the development of three important traits: self-awareness, self-advocacy, and self-purpose.
We believe that everyone is created on and for a purpose. Once you find out what your purpose is, you have a compass pointing in the direction you want to go. The only way for a student to find his/her purpose is through experiences and allowing the student to fail. Appropriate Independence consists of allowing the students the freedom of choice. Instead of dictating what students may and may not do. Appropriate Independence allows a student understanding of the consequences of their action, and then leaves the choice up to their discernment. Failure provides opportunities for growth.
As a college student I grew in my independence as I became self-aware of my abilities and strengths. Through the trial of pink socks, I learned how to do my own laundry, cook a meal without setting off the smoke detector, and manage my finances. I grew in my independence as I took on each new responsibility. My own journey was a long path of self-discovery, trials, and failures. Pink socks taught me not to mix my whites and colors in the wash. An impulse buy of shoes taught me the consequences of having a negative balance in a bank account. A long night with open windows and blowing fans taught me not to attempt a microwaved baked potato for dinner. By giving freedom with responsibility, Appropriate Independence seeks to foster meaningful growth from everyday experiences.
To read more on this topic, click HERE, and you’ll be directed to Sarah’s complete article on Shepherds Resources.
[1]Kinkade, Dr. Russ. Appropriate Independence: Potential Realized. (Union Grove, WI: Shepherds Baptist Ministries, 2006), 2.